Ask Annie: BDSM Conferences?

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Dear Annie,

I am a newcomer to the BDSM scene, but I was thinking of attending one of the big national conferences to try to understand more about the lifestyle. Should I go? If I do, how should I prepare myself for the event?”

Confused in Cincinnati

Dear Confused,

By all means you should go. BDSM conferences are a great way to meet people and get a good BDSM education. It doesn’t matter which one you go to, they all have the same presenters teaching the same classes. However, if you don’t want to come across as too much of a newbie, there are a few things you can do make yourself more comfortable.

First and foremost, NEVER say you are new. The proper line is to say you are just now entering the public scene, but you have been doing it either a) for years or b) all your life. The second thing you need to learn to do is talk about yourself, incessantly. All “real” people can fill a three to four hour lunch or dinner without stories and tales about themselves and how awesome they are. If you end the meeting and know anything at all about the person you were with you probably aren’t “leather.”

Finally, you will need a hat. Everyone who is anyone in has a hat. You can get away with any kind of wardrobe as long as you have the right hat.

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