Hello Kitty Fired in “Dominatrix Kitty” Scandal

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TOKYO, JAPAN

In what has been called “Kitty-gatu” and the “bad kitty scandal” in Japan, is now affecting consumers worldwide.  Kitty White, mascot and inspiration for Sanrio’s “Hello Kitty” brand of merchandise since 1976, has been discovered to be moonlighting as a professional dominatrix at Tokyo’s most famous Mistress bar “La Siora.”

A Sanrio spokesperson told The Daily Flogger, “We simply can’t have Ms. White doing things that make people think Hello Kitty is a sex pervert.”

It may be too late, as underground Hello Kitty branded sex toys have been showing up in the BDSM community at an unprecedented rate.  Whips, floggers, spanking paddles, handcuffs, kinky tattoos and brandings have all been appearing at increasing rates.

MasterDoominus69 commented on the popular fetish website Fetlife, “Weird, I thought Hello Kitty was a bottom?”

Kitty White, who is now in seclusion, could not be reached for comment.  A spokesperson for the kawaii kitty told The Daily Flogger, “It wouldn’t matter much anyway.  In case you never noticed, she doesn’t have a mouth.  It’s not like she could tell you anything anyway.”

When asked for an official comment from Ms. White, the spokesperson only said she was “relieved that now everyone can see what a bitch she’s had to work for all these years.  Kawaii my ass!”

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    • We blame others. Poor romanji of キティゲート . Those responsible are being punished as we speak.

      We apologize for the inconvenience.

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