BDSM Rumor Mill Violates Laws of Physics

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CERN, SWITZERLAND

A Swiss couple in a Master/slave relationship has given scientists in quantum theory something new to think about.  The couple found out that the slave had been released from service hours before the couple had even decided to split up.

Myron Tittlesbock, research scientist at the CERN supercollider, said that since the discovery of a new sub atomic particle, the “Radioactive Unifying Molecular Rings” or RUMoR, reality has been subject to occasional reversals of cause and effect.

“We didn’t even know our relationship was in trouble,” the couple told The Daily Flogger, “until we heard the RUMoR.”  At first, they didn’t realize the RUMoR was even related to them, but eventually it became clear.

“We had to break up, because in the RUMoR, we already had,” the couple stated.  “It was really sad, we didn’t want to, but it was already decided for us.”

According to Tittlesbock, “sometimes the RUMoR can be so powerful it can actually warp reality and make something factually and objectively wrong into something that everyone regards as true.”

Martha James, also a research scientist at CERN, said that RUMoRs appear everywhere but seem to be particularly extreme and focused in the BDSM community.  “We are seeing more and more BDSM RUMoRs make their way into the community.  It is frightening,” she said.

 
photo credit: Marvin (PA) cc

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