Sploshing named “Silliest Fetish”

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EUGENE, OREGON

A survey of more than 20,000 members of the “kink” community has designated “sploshing,” the use of food or food-like substances for sexual gratification, as the “silliest fetish.”

Early runners up included “sitting on balloons and popping them,” “coffee enemas,” and “head shaving.”

Morgan Stansworth, who commissioned the survey, said the competition was fierce.  “What it comes down to was that the sploshing people people we better organized, more focused, and really got out the message.  The balloon people gave them a run for their money, especially early on,” said Stansworth.

Accepting the award “on behalf of the sploshing community” was James Michael Smarthington, publicity manager and advertising executive for General Mills foods.  “It takes a lot of people to make an award like this happen,” Smarthington told a room full of kinksters covered in various food stuffs.  Most of the people he thanked were representatives of food companies big on the “must have sploshing list.”

“We had a real advantage with the name,” WetNMessyGal told The Daily Flogger, “it just sounds silly, so I think we had a leg up.  When you say ‘sploshing’ people ask ‘hey, what’s that?’  When you say I like to sit on balloons and pop them, people don’t really want to talk to you much about it.”

Even though the competition was intense, WetNMessyGal had a good feeling from the beginning.  “You just have to trust,” she said, “and with trust and belief, and a couple gallons of lime green jell-o, pretty much anything is possible.”

photo credit: basurablancaphoto cc

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