Archaeological Dig Reveals Ancient Egyptians into Some “Really Kinky Shit”

1

DETROIT, EGYPT

Dr. Leonard N. Minks, lead researcher on this year’s dig in Egypt, sponsored by California University, has uncovered what appears to be one of the earliest records of BDSM.

Found in carvings on an ancient wall of what appears to be the first play space, Minks has discovered ancient Egyptians were into some of the more taboo fetishes of necrophilia, bestiality, and pedophilia, but also had “invented a few of their own.”

One apparently sexual practice called “catting” referred to either “worshipping or dismembering a cat while stimulating one’s genitals with melon or passion fruit.”

There are several ambiguities that, according to Minks, are difficult to resolve. “The hieroglyphs for masturbation and beheading and virtually identical, as are the symbols for foot worship and bathing in the vomit of old men.”

While there are many references to “kink” the ancients did not appear to engage in what are today called “power exchange” relationships.

“Well, they actually had slaves,” says Minks, “so that wouldn’t have seemed that kinky to them.”

Photo credit: upyernoz

Share.

1 Comment

Leave A Reply